Brian
Author Archive

Brian

soup can
BlogForced Feeding

It’s no “Stanley Trzetrzelewskakiewiczski’s Traditional Egg Drop Soup,” certainly… But that McDougall knows his Asians. And if ya go tellin’ ‘im any different, he’ll knock yer teeth out! On a side note, if you haven’t yet tried Shamus MacGillicuddy’s Traditional Bolognese, you’re really missing out.

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jinn and juice
Blog

Jinn and Juice. Great duos make the movie sometimes. Consider Marty and Doc. Tango and Cash. Kirk and Spock. Jake and Elwood or John Connor and the Terminator, or Riggs and Murtaugh… How about Vincent and Jules, or Hansel and Zoolander? You get the drift. Much like Han and Chewie

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seafood disaster
Blog

With regard to the photos of your dinner: Please stop posting these. Seriously. I mean, any fucktard with even the most basic communication skills can place an order in a restaurant. It’s not something to be bragging about. (“Looky what done happened! I gots food.”) In fact, I’d venture to

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mung solo lbum
BlogForced Listening

You may know of Led Zeppelin (and other bands as well) having had practice sessions in Clearwell Castle following Robert Plant’s personal tragedy, but you may not be aware of the band Helium Submarine and their lower-budget recording sessions high in the Rocky Mountains. As I complete my research and

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Blog

Anyone can imagine a world of peace and love and never-ending happiness and blue skies and all of that bullshit. And anyone who watches enough television can imagine a world based within a world that’s taking place in an alternate reality of their favorite show. However, it takes a real

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Blog

When it comes to updating a room in the old house, little can compare to the utter rage-inducing past time of painting the walls… and spattering that color all over the flooring, regardless of how careful you were in shoring-up that drop cloth. The choices in hue are endless, as

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sweet potato pie chart
Blog

All of this “racial tension” talk, and nobody taking the time to look at the things that bring us all together and blur the lines put in place by some social constructs or other meaningless media-fueled bullshit designed to further divide. We’re all just people, really. And having never seen

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app launch
Blog

Brian’s Billion-Dollar Business Ideas #5,688,004: Whet Your APP-etite. For the people who just need to share fucking EVERYTHING, and document each cup of coffee and meal and trek to Target and each time their dog wags its tail and they get the car washed and, well, go get the deal…

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Blog

There I am, watching The Love Boat, and it hits me: It’s not the sort of show you can just join midway through the third season. I’m completely lost at this point… The plot is all over the place. I mean there’s a gopher loose on the ship, but then

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BlogFamily Dinner Discussions

Actual Breakfast conversation: Ethical Cannibalism. “I don’t believe that it would be as simple as a cut-and-dried argument about just WHICH people would be eaten.” “True. They would have to be ‘food-safe’ or inspected like beef and so-on.” “Are we talking people farms? Like ‘we can breed them in Montana,

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